At least the Granny Square Dress was forgiving

because this sure as shootin’ aint!

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Bikini or Not? (Low Work Safe Factor)

Today’s item *may* be a bikini, in the same way that I *may* be considered a chef.

The rampant nature of crochet has seen it spread into swimwear,

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 or posing-in-the-sunwear,

 to the point some starlets have become confused about the place of the pineapple swimsuit

 

and taken it out for the evening.

I don’t know who Blu Cantrell is, but she appears to be trying to get some exposure here.

In the chain (get it??) of crocheted poolside wear, comes something purporting to be a

“bikini”

(and I’m being careful, unless the Unnecessary Quotation Marks people come to get me)

and we end up with something that I can only loosely describe as a nipple tether.

 

I’m not a member of the Breastapo, but…. hrm.

And I am  really hoping there’s some motif applicated to the bottom half and that the model isn’t that in need of planned maintenance.

If you can’t bribe them

Terrify them! or  How to get your Model to pose for a shoot when it’s all Fug.

The response I’ve always had to those who complain about the writing of a snark blog is that “No-one has a gun to your head, forcing you to read it.”

  True – look around, see?  No masked crocheter holding a .45 to your head threatening to redecorate the wall in an interesting new colour called “Hint of Brain”. 

You no like, you can go up to the left to the back button or up to the right to the search window and… look for something else.

If you’re a model and you’ve been presented with something less than stellar to wear perhaps the circumstances maybe different, depending on how much you need the next pair of Christin Louboutins.

What technique this photographer used – not sure but I’m intrigued as to what made this the best that the art director had to use…

 

I love the Russian crochet patterns as much as the next deranged wool-pig, but…..

the belt that looks like you’ve been eviscerated… not so much.

Yarn bombing – There’s a line, you guys!

The phenomenomenomenom (ba-bah-bah) of Yarn-bombing is knitted and crocheted pieces surreptititously wrapped around public features like trees and statues by guerilla knitters and crocheters.

                            

And has been around for a while.

  My last personal spotting of a yarn-bomb was in Wellington, New Zealand, around the neck of John Plimmer’s dog. I tried to get a photo but as Wellington rivals Chicago for being known as the Windy City, I was blown somewhere towards Auckland before getting my camera out.  When in Wellington, we choose to stay at the Travelodge, and eat at the Balti House Indian Restaurant.  Try the Butter Chicken.

Covering items with crochet has been taken to artistic levels, and with a nod to those of you who pressgang doiles into service in dresses, with the result being a piano that looks like it’s had a visit from a frustrated Jack Frost or She-lob in an artistic mood…

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That’s all fine and good, and the piano isn’t left wondering why this has happened to him.  Unlike our case in point for the day.

Guys – who the hell yarn-bombed the tortoise????