Sadly, Bambi turned to a life of Crime

And adopted a cunning disguise during his Bank Hold Up spree.

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Husbands and Wives – Joint hobbies don’t always work…

I can see it as being a great idea, to  open new lines of communication, bring you both closer together, and eventually: rediscover each other,

But….

Some hobbies aren’t meant to be shared.         Or Mixed.

Crochet and the Art of Skoda Maintenance?

Mr Clarkson, Hammo and Captain Slow would be p’ing themselves right now….

Or making a racist joke about another country which is guaranteed to get them on the front pages around the world.

That most Resident Evil: Things that eat keys

Welcome to 2011, and I apologise for the short break in communications.  For those of you who are familiar with Australia, and <WARNING – HORRIBLE MUSAK>  a poem by a homesick schoolgirl, mine is a country of droughts and… flooding rains.

We’re in the second at present, and donations to those 28,000 who have lost their homes can be made through:

http://www.qld.gov.au/floods/donate.html

And the concept of loss brings me firmly to today’s Crocheted Monstrosity.  I run a continual battle with The Handbag That Eats Keys and so I felt, at a visceral level, for the peson who has obviously, obviously, lost her keys, lipstick and possibly: a small child to this example of why acrylic yarn and prescriptions should not be combined.

There comes a time, when you have to throw it out

Every so often you do have to be hard hearted about your wardrobe.

Some things are never, ever, no matter how much reliance you place on the Detox diet, EVER going to fit again.  Some items are really those that time and fashion have forgotten.

Others, have felt the bite of verminous creatures: moths, mice and rampaging critters.

If the said garment falls into the first category, it is possible that a good home can be found on eBay, or some worthy cause – Goodwill, St Vincents etc will be grateful. Sometimes, even those relics lurking in the second row find new purpose with some one less fashion conscious as yourself , going to a theme party perhaps.

It’s the jersey that’s been attacked by a cat or in this case – I suspect a rabid velociraptor; that you shouldn’t try to flog as “Unique”

Even a dog would huck that out of it’s basket.

This isn’t What Not To Crochet, this is What Crochet Not To Salvage.

Fine, Fix or Flick – Are You Strong Enough?

 

I wonder if  Structural Integrity in Garment making is an elective unit because my suspicions are that this designer missed the day they talked about Gravity at school.

And also – methinks it’s cheating to have the model lying on her side in the case of this top.

On the plus side, I Lerve this colour.  I want to keep this yarn as breeding stock to produce more blush/ wine tops.

The beads scattered throughout the fabric? That’s rather -not- me, but I can understand how a teen/ junior20ish could love this.

The stitchwork in the neckline is where the hairs on the back of my neck start to stand up.  That is a simply terrific stitch pattern – Irish crochet hankerchief edging put to work somewhere.. where it may not be able to stand the strain.

Five points of attachment in front (guessing the same in back…) is not a lot.

So – for today’s Fine, Fix or Flick – What would you do? Are you confident that your work would hold up? If you bought it off the rack or had finished the item and doubts were growing  – What would you do to gird the neckline and avoid a Wardrobe malfunction?