At least the Granny Square Dress was forgiving

because this sure as shootin’ aint!

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If you can’t bribe them

Terrify them! or  How to get your Model to pose for a shoot when it’s all Fug.

The response I’ve always had to those who complain about the writing of a snark blog is that “No-one has a gun to your head, forcing you to read it.”

  True – look around, see?  No masked crocheter holding a .45 to your head threatening to redecorate the wall in an interesting new colour called “Hint of Brain”. 

You no like, you can go up to the left to the back button or up to the right to the search window and… look for something else.

If you’re a model and you’ve been presented with something less than stellar to wear perhaps the circumstances maybe different, depending on how much you need the next pair of Christin Louboutins.

What technique this photographer used – not sure but I’m intrigued as to what made this the best that the art director had to use…

 

I love the Russian crochet patterns as much as the next deranged wool-pig, but…..

the belt that looks like you’ve been eviscerated… not so much.

If you only knew one crochet stitch

what could you make?

The absolute manic obsession some have for washcloths would probably be the answer

not pictured: washing

Ok.. sure. Whatever waters your flowers.

I’d like to take a moment to point something out about the above before we head to an example of Boredom in Crochet.  Those washcloths have a) colour and b) texture.

See unlike knitting, where all you have is a knit stitch and a purl stitch, Crocheters have a great deal more latitude. Yes, the beloved Yarn Harlot may turn out some gorgeous work, and has done incredible things with Knitters without Borders but even she (and Debbie Bliss and Jean Greenhowe) are limited to just.. knit and purl.

Crocheters – not withstanding which terminology is used, we have a wealth of stitches that can be used.  And that’s before we even get into stitch Patterns!

Shawshank fans may wonder if there's a hook hidden away inside.
Redemption lies within

Single Crochet, that lovely Half Double Crochet. Double Crochet, Treble Crochet and beyond.

So… armed with even the most uninspiring of yarns, and being forced, yes – perhaps at gunpoint, to use only one stitch from the array at our disposal,  what would YOU come up with?

Because that is my only explanation for how today’s Misstitched item has come about. 

I hesitate to refer to it as ugly – because it has no feature to latch on to, except being a) white and b) enormous and c) without character at all.

This is not a crochet disaster, because that would imply clashing colours, a train wreck of features and generally : a crocheted casualty section. this… looks more like a repurposed hospital blanket.